


One shot

by Ticktockmrcopper



Category: Ballum, EastEnders (TV), ben mitchell and callum highway
Genre: Ballum eastenders, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:15:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22976779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ticktockmrcopper/pseuds/Ticktockmrcopper
Summary: One shot fic on fridays episode where ballum are reunited and ben breaks down over his hearing loss
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	One shot

Ben walked down the road staring at his phone. His thumb lingered over Callum's name. He hadn't been to see him since yesterday. He knew he should but he hated himself for putting Callum in danger. Ben couldn't get the image of Callum laying there motionless out of his head. His skin had felt frozen and his face had been drained of all colour. When he had seen him laying there Ben honestly thought Callum was dead. It was just like Paul still and not moving and deathly pale. Ben shivered as the images of Paul and Callum flashed through his mind. Suddenly he was pushed into a wall and someone was gripping him tightly. His heart banged against his chest and the rushing in his ears as though he was underwater pulsed uncomfortably. He blinked and his Mums face swam into view. Confused Ben looked around widly and saw Keegan on his moped staring at him furiously. His lips were moving but Ben couldn't make out what Keegan was saying. He saw Karen pass them and go to keegan. Ben breathed in deeply trying to compose himself. He felt his Mum touch his arm and turn him to look at her. He looked at her reluctantly and lipread her words.

"When were you going to tell me you can't hear?"

Ben felt his stomach drop.

Back in the Mitchell house Ben sat at the table still composing himself after the incident. He had nothing to focus on but the awful muffled sounds in his ears as though they were fillled with water. It was constant and Ben was struggling to hide his fear and panic now. Before all his attention was focused on finding Callum but now that he was safe Ben could no longer ignore his desperate situation and it made him feel helpless. A hand touched his shoulder jerking him out of his thoughts and making him jump. He saw his Mum and took a few breaths to calm himself. He felt his Mums warm touch on his arm again and saw her speak.

"Sorry darling". 

He managed a small smile to reassure her. He looked at her and understood her saying "I bought you some lunch". 

Ben looked away not wanting his Mum to see him so vulnerable. He felt her touch his arm again and he looked up slowly. Kathy looked at him and said "Can you hear me at all"? 

Ben nodded" A few words". 

He picked up the box she gave him. 

"Lunch thanks". 

He looked down at the table feeling his emotions rising. Kathy looked at him worried and gently prompted his attention. 

"What did the doctors say?" She asked.

Ben looked at her blankly but his eyes showed his emotion at not being able to understand her. Kathy felt her heart clench. 

"The doctor?" She repeated. 

Understanding and relief dawned on Bens face. 

"Oh he said um he said theres an operation i can try but theres no guarantee it would work". 

He smiled bravely and looked down at the table. Kathy felt her heart break but she was determined to be there for her son. 

She put her hand over Ben's and said smiling "It will". 

Ben returned her smile but it didnt meet his eyes. 

"Yeah he said quietly. 

He swallowed down the lump in his throat tears pricking his eyes.

Kathy touched his hand again and asked "hows Callum?" 

Ben looked at her helplessly.

"Callum" she repeated smiling encouragingly. 

Ben's heart clenched painfully at the mention of Callum's name. He shook his head 

" I...i haven't...i haven't been to see him yet". 

He hung his head trying to fight the wave of emotions battling inside him. Kathy waited patiently knowing her son was about to open up.

" If I hadn't of seen his war medal from his grandad Mum...i....i would never have known he was there. He...he could of been shouting out, he could have been screaming at me for all i know and i would never have known".

Ben cut off as his eyes burned with tears and he buried his head in his hands. Kathy felt her heart break seeing her son so fragile, she heard footsteps and saw Stuart and Callum walk in. Ben looked up and froze when he saw Callum's face. His pain eased as he took in Callum's features. His eyes shone with tears as he saw the love in Callum's eyes and he smiled despite himself. Callum's heart stopped as he saw Ben. When he had heard the news he felt as though someone had crushed his heart in his hands. He knew instantly why Ben had kept his distance and he was desperate to see him to reassure him. 

In the kitchen Ben handed Callum a glass of water. He saw Callum's mouth moving but couldn't understand him. 

"If you want me to understand you, you have to look at me" he said sharply walking towards the counter and leaning on it for support. 

Callum smiled despite himself, Ben's moodiness had always been appealing and boy had he missed his boyfriend. 

He looked at Ben directly and said "Thank you". 

"Your welcome" Ben said emphasising the welcome. 

Callum started to say something else but Ben couldn't make any of it out. He felt frustration bubbling up inside of him and he rubbed his head with his hands. Callum broke of halfway through his speech realising that Ben couldn't understand him. 

He looked at him sadly "you haven't got the foggiest idea what I'm going on about do you?" 

Ben took a deep breath and forced the words out of his mouth "The doctor said i might never hear again. Your better off without me Callum alright?" 

He turned away tears threatening to spill out, his heart breaking. He had been desperate to get Callum back but now....who would ever want him now? What use was he to anyone? Who could ever fancy or love him again? 

Callum stared at the back of Ben's head. He had expected this, it was typical Ben. But he also understood why he did this. Callum saw Ben's shoulders shaking and his shaky breaths and knew he was trying to hold back the tears. He went over to Ben and gently placed his hands on his trembling shoulders. Ben looked slightly and turned away. Keeping one hand firmly on Bens shoulder Callum used his other hand to trace I love you on Ben's back. Ben felt the words callum traced and smiled despite himself , the pain in his chest easing slightly. Callum put both hands back on Bens shoulders looking at him. 

Ben took a deep breath and said shakily "You got a second chance at life so dont.....dont waste it on me". 

He felt his voice breaking and cursed inwardly. Callum looked at him and devastation that Ben thought he wasnt worth it and amused annoyance at his stuborness bubbled inside of him. He tightened his grip. 

"Ben" he said softly and gently turned hin around to face him and placed a hand on his cheek. 

Ben looked at him reluctantly his eyes swimming with tears , his face pained. Callum looked at him directly and said "Shut up". 

He stroked Ben's cheek. "Hearing or deaf I would still do you in a heart beat".

Ben looked at Callum his heart filling with joy at his declaration of commitment and amused confusion at what Callum had just said.

"Did you just say what i think you just said"?he asked slowly. 

Callum looked at him adoringly and laughed. Ben smiled as the fight left him and he succumbed to Callum's love. Callum stared at him his eyes burning with love for his boyfriend and pulled him into a deeply passionate kiss. He had missed his touch so much. Ben allowed himself to be held and his heart soared as he kissed Callum passionately.

Ben and Callum lay on the sofa together relaxing after eating the chicken pasta Callum had made them. Ben lay on Callum's chest feeling the rhythm of his heartbeat. It made him feel comforted and it was a reminder that Callum was here, he was alive. Callum held him in his arms relieved that he was safe and able to hold Ben again. He knew Ben was hurting and he wasnt his usual sassy self but Callum would get him through it. Callum ran a comforting hand through Ben's hair stroking it. He had always loved playing with Ben's fluffy hair. Ben smiled as Callum played with his hair, it always made him feel better. 

"Stuart caught me up with everything Callum said. 

He looked down at Ben and remembered he coudnt hear him. He picked up his phone and typed up the message. Ben saw Callum typing and Callum passed him the phone. Ben read it and looked up at Callum. 

"The boat crash, Whitney, leo dead" Callum said. 

"Self defence apparently" said Ben.

He settled back into Callum's arms. "She'll be alright. 

Callum shifted and Ben looked up. 

"I need to see her" he said. 

Ben nodded understanding. "Okay" he said softly. 

Callum nodded in appreciation and then remembered Dennis. 

He looked at Ben and said "And Dennis, I'm so sorry". 

He put his hand on Ben's heart but Ben turned away from him, his walls going up instantly. Callum felt his heart sink when Ben turned away. It was clearly too soon and he didnt want his boyfriend pushing him away again. He hesitated and then remembered when Ben wanted to forget he turned to sex. Callum just wanted to see his Ben smiling again. He messaged Ben and waited for him to look at the message. Ben felt his phone vibrate and looked. He smiled when he saw the message.

"Oh really"? He said "you sure your up for it?"

Callum laughed.

"I mean last time i saw you lying flat on your back you were half dead". 

Callum smiled and said "I'm up for it". 

Ben looked at him and smiled. "I better get us some more beers then". 

He got up from the sofa. 

"And you better get upstairs". 

Callum laughed and got up slowly holding his ribs and headed upstairs.

Ben got two bottles of beers from the fridge and opened the drawer to get the bottle opener. He closed the drawer and was about to open a bottle when a thought struck him. He opened the drawer and slammed it shut. Nothing but a faint muffle. He did it again but nothing changed. Ben felt frustration and helpless rising inside of him and his heart started to thump loudly. He went over to the sink and turned the tap on. He hardly heard anything and the spraying of water brought back memories of the boat crash. Ben felt his breathing get shaky as he turned the tap on again harder. His terror over his situation threatened to consume him. He picked up a pot and pan and banged them together in a desperate attempt to hear. Nothing. Ben started to shake and sob as he continued to bang the pots desperately wanting to hear. 

Callum hears banging sounds and rushed downstairs confused and concerned. He saw Ben standing there banging the pots and heard him crying uncontrollably and it made his heart break. He rushed over to him and put a hand on his shoulders. Ben dropped the pots and Callum reached over to turn off the taps. Ben tried to grab more things but callum stopped him. Ben screamed and attempted to fight Callum off but Callum refused to let go. Ben eventully stopped fighting and leant against the sink sobs ripping out of his body. 

Callum stroked his hair and held him saying "Stop stop its going to be alright".

Ben punched a pot and Callum protectively covered his hand to stop him hurting himself saying " Stop stop". 

Ben sobbed desperately as Callum held him close and stroked his hair reassuring him " Its going to be alright". 

In bed Ben lay against Callum's chest feeling exhausted and emotionally drained. He felt Callum's heartbeat comforting and reassuring him, Callums hand stroked through his hair soothing him. Callum held Ben protectively in his arms playing with his hair. He had never seen his boyfriend so vulnerable, so open, so scared before and it broke his heart. He just wanted to take his pain away. Callum vowed to be by Ben's side through everything. He wouldn't give up on him, they would get through this. He kissed the top of Ben's head gentley and Ben kissed his hand reciprocating his gesture and touch. They would get through this together.


End file.
